Slow progression of contact leaves father frustrated

When a parent has not seen their child for a significant period of time then re-establishing contact can be a slow process.

This can be especially so if the child is quite young – the lack of contact may even mean that that parent is a stranger to them.

In such cases a typical scenario might be that contact might begin with supervised sessions a contact centre, then after a number of sessions progress to short periods of unsupervised contact, and only after that is successful progress to overnight staying contact.

This whole process can take some months to complete. Obviously, this can be quite frustrating for the parent, who wants to have immediate staying contact (and often sees no reason why that should not happen).

But patience is the key. The parent must be prepared to ‘play the long game’, complying with the contact schedule ordered by the court, in the knowledge that if they do so then they should ultimately be able to enjoy the contact that they seek.

The consequences of a parent’s impatience were starkly demonstrated by a case that was heard by the Family Court in Birmingham in December.

The case concerned a father’s contact with his daughter. Unfortunately, the judgment does not give us any details as to the child’s age, or when she last saw her father, but we are told that the father had not got an established bond with his daughter, who did not even refer to him as “daddy”.

In July 2024 the court made a child arrangements order which provided for fortnightly supported contact for one hour and then, after three months, fortnightly unsupervised in the community, with a view to progression to overnight contact.

Unfortunately, the contact did not go to plan. In December 2024 the court, concerned about the effect of domestic abuse worries upon the mother’s mental health, ordered that contact should continue to be supported until further order.

Following this, there were a number of incidents of criminal damage to motor vehicles owned by the mother’s family or used by the mother’s family, as well as their property.

The mother applied to suspend the child arrangements order, and re-open a fact-finding hearing that took place in August 2023, when her allegations of abuse by the father were not proved.

Rather than take those steps, the court decided to investigate the recent incidents of criminal damage, to establish whether they were the father’s doing.

The court found that the father undertook the acts of criminal damage, due to his frustrations in relation to the progression of contact, or instructed others to do so on his behalf.

We are not told what is to happen next in the case, but obviously these findings will likely mean that there will be no further progression in the father’s contact at this time, and may mean that the contact will indeed be suspended.

You can read the full report of the case here.

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